Well if you have followed my blog at all or scanned through our website you will have noticed that besides writing I have many other passions and music is at the top of the list.
2 years ago we released our debut album. “DOG KUF” and slowly started to build a fan base. Over the next 2 years we worked on the new one “Sandbox Junkies” which was planned to be released 2 months ago but life got in the way and it will be put on hold for awhile but since the music was completed I decided to release the music as videos on You Tube for people to enjoy.
I will offer 2 of the songs here and the rest over a period of time on the blog. If you like these songs or even if you don’t please share for others to decide for themselves.
My life has taken a big left turn, a huge curve ball and a reshaping of what I value and how I will live. I am now in a position where i must start again. In cleaning out the life I had I must reorganize. In doing so I have rediscovered artwork I had done years ago that had been put away in the back of closets. I would like to share my art with all who are willing to see.
I thank you all for looking and please feel free to share anything you like. I just ask that you give me credit for my work.
Now these are all originals that I took pictures of;
It has been awhile since I have written on my blog. Like I have said I was facing a personal tragedy that has taken me some time to work through. I am so thankful that I acknowledged the steps one must take to get through. I did not fight them but let them happen. I never knew I had so many tears in me. I am starting to get to the last stage but will still go back and forth between the last 3 stages of grief. Acceptance is the goal.
As my world view changes on my journey and as I try to keep both my eyes and my mind open I continually learn. I see so much waste of potential in humanity focusing on the things that do harm not bring about positive change and happiness.
Sometimes I think I am in the wrong place and in the wrong time. I feel as though I do not belong here and do not fit in. I long for a society where the beings are peaceful and have put their barbaric past behind them. I feel I would fit in there. I just get sick and tired of all the bullshit and harm we do to each other. It is so unnecessary and counterproductive to the species.
I am sick and tired;
Of the way we treat each other.
Of people focusing on the negatives in life and not looking for the good in each other.
Of lies and more lies and more lies as I see fear, lies and drama as the killer of humanity.
Of not acknowledging and accepting the truth on anything.
Of our lack of empathy towards each other.
Of wilful stupidity.
Of just doing the wrong thing for all the wrong reasons..
Of our complete lack of foresight as a species.
Of our lack of humility when called for.
Of our selfishness that does not include the welfare of others.
Of our runaway greed and self indulgent behaviour.
Of all our fighting and violence towards each other.
Of ignorance.
Of not sharing with each other creating a gap in our well being.
Of just not listening to those that can truly set us free..
Of our belief in things we cannot know to be true and the resulting behaviour of acting on those beliefs.
Of constantly appealing to the emotions that do not bring about the best in us.
Of wilfully hurting others and just not giving a shit…..
Of ignoring reality and the consequences of this action….
Of the blinders we seem to like to wear and the paths of destruction this can leave behind.
I really have hope for our species but at the same time I do believe most of us do not deserve the lives we have been allowed as we waste them. We waste our potential and our limited time in life. I have watched people engage in self indulgent behaviour ignorant to the consequences, to the effect on others. I am sure we all have seen this at some point.
Can we make it? I think we can but it will take a leader unlike anyone we have seen before, A person who shows us a position we have rarely seen and then the willingness to listen to this person.
I really am sick and tired of all the bullshit and to be very frank here most of what we do to each other is absolute bullshit.
It is our fears in life that propel us to run from all that is good, right and true. What I have seen has led me to the conclusion that this is not something we can escape although humanity tries hard with a terrible cost. What is right and true will eventually prevail. One can only run so long until they must turn around. It is then when one faces their fears and is willing to take the road back while difficult well worth it that they will have a worthy life. This is inevitable for all. If we could only learn to accept this before we start running away from truth, what is just and what is right we could rise to our potential as individuals and as a species.
I try to see the good in humanity and the good in all. I try to see the potential not where they are at.
I offer this as a mantra of sorts that if we could all adopt we could begin to achieve who we truly can be;
I will see the good in you even when you do not.
I will see what you can become even when you do not.
I will look beyond where you are at and see where you can be.
I will take your hurt and your pain so that you can be free.
I will be a light when you are lost.
I will be an anchor when you are adrift.
I will see you even when you do not see yourself & I will be there when you are ready to see me.
Gary David Currie 10/12/2011
I believe love can conquer fear, that right will trump wrong and that justice will prevail. I have hope for humanity, I have hope for those lost and we must make the light brighter for those to find their way back.
I feel as though I do not belong here but also realize that I do. I hope one will rise above the voices that deceive us, that this person will value truth and see the good in us all and that we are finally ready to listen.
Personally I have nothing left to fear. I have faced my fears and now I am ready to truly live. I hope all can reach this point as it is liberating…
We must face our fears or they will face us.
I must have hope for without hope we all have lost our way……….
I have not been writing lately due to some personal issues, I would like to thank you all for taking time out of your life’s to read my thoughts on various issues and how life works.
At the end of the day this is just a blog and its importance in my life pails in comparison to many other things. I write because I enjoy it and believe I have something worthy to say. I keep my personal life for the most part separate from my public persona as I believe all should
So many things we see as important in life really are not. We get caught up in all the details of daily life that actually cause us harm if we do not keep them in perspective. One must be willing to lose everything that can be lost and I not talking about the loss of life here but all things we see of value that can be easily replaced and truly only have the meaning we give them. If you are willing to lose all these things you will find something more valuable. What that will be for you will be you journey.
One must be willing to face their fears and let go of them in order to truly have a great and meaningful life. I really don’t think most understand or are willing understand the concept behind what I am saying here as it is our fears that seem to cause most of our problems.
Once again I thank all who have read my thoughts and very soon I will get back into the rhythm I had before.
At times it seems that nothing seems to go our way that something is plotting against us and that life is trying to beat us up and kick us when we are down. I have no idea why this happens if there is an actual cause or if it is just the way life works but it is during these time that we look for answers as to why things are going as we see it wrong. This is the time we need to do our best to get through seek out answers that are true to the best of our knowledge and do our best to move on dealing with what is in our control.
My son had a car accident last night and it was a good one. He is fine and that is what must be the focus. We can always get another car but not another son. It is times like this that we should pause and see the value in what we have, in what we can loose and what is truly important. Some may do this and others may just focus on the negatives. I will choose to be thankful for what I do have.
Is there something trying to direct our lives, to tell us a message to correct an unbalance in the natural order or is it that shit just happens?
Often it takes these events to give us a smack and let us know we need to readjust, to take stock of our lives and to move on in a direction that is not the one we are taking. This is a crucial time as I feel that most people when this happens focus on the wrong things tending to look for a solution that is truly not the right one and to blame others and life for what they should be taking responsibility for. We must pause and say what do I have that I am not valuing right now, doesn’t matter what the negatives are as we can let them become our focus what matters is what I don’t want to lose. Think about whom if they died you would be in terrible pain, who you would miss and then just get on with the positives in life. Yes of course we have to deal with any problems we have created and the consequences of our actions but if you focus on these positives the solutions and the way you deal with the perceived terrible things in your life will all seem trivial. Value the people your truly love as they cannot be replaced but all things can.
No matter what you are going through, no matter how bad the situation seems, no matter the problems you face they can all be overcome. Anything you felt as a negative should take on new meaning once this is realized and you should find yourself seeing life with different eyes, eyes that are clear and eyes that have true hope. The problems you have been running from, not wanting to deal with or that seem overwhelming will be nothing to overcome.
We often travel down a path of avoidance that leads us in making bad decisions that we think ar good ones at the time and no one can tell us any different. It shouldn’t but it often takes a traumatic event in ones life to bring this to light. Again this is where it becomes crucial that we do not keep running but think that we are not as one
must always go back and face the problems that brought us there in the first place.
Take a marriage for example there are always points where things become overwhelming and the act of living gets in the way of what should be important. Then the blame and dislike start to creep in and eventually the hate takes over as the wall is built. Now I am not referring to a relationship of continual violence and controlling behaviour but to just the average couple who just gets beat up at times by what life dishes out. It is at this point that it would be wise to see the things that they saw in each other when they first got married, to focus on the love they had and when this is done the other problems start to fall into place for what they truly are just problems that life hands us daily.
It is so easy to comfort yourself and hide from what one must face but again these issues and problems will have to be faced no matter what so why not do it together then when tragedy strikes there will be strength for all. When we have those close calls we will rally around those we love and deal with what life throws at us.
Secrets and lies kill in life and they are often the product of our imagination as the reality of the situation is usually nowhere close to the fantasy that we build to protect ourselves during the tough times in life.
So take pause in your life, be thankful for what you do have, for what you do not want to lose and let down those walls. If you have taken the time to build lives with people think hard about them on a daily basis to what is really important and don’t let life separate you from this. Nothing will be stronger in the end.
Maybe there is a force in the universe at work maybe it is trying to tell us to not get caught up in the crap that is going to happen anyways and that we usually make worst be not facing it. Maybe this force is trying to bring balance back in to our lives and maybe we should pause to listen.
The hardest thing in life in my opinion is doing what is right, valuing the truth and have the integrity to stick with this.
Part of staying the course is to realize that one makes mistakes and that one can be wrong on anything and that truth will always show up and find its way through the lies. Often we think we have the truth or that we are doing what is right but as we look deeper peeling away the layers of deception and lies when we do get there it is often not what we want it to be or think it is. It is our fears that hold us back and fears are usually based on what might be not what actually is.
“We must face our fears or our fears will face us.”
Gary David Currie
In my life staying the course has cost me in so many ways but I realize that if I give in to what is not true and give up on seeking the truth with openness and a desire to face the fears I would just be living a lie. The layers of the onion at times are so thick it will seem impossible to peel them all away but if it is of value it must be done and it will always be of value because it is your life. I can think of nothing more important than living a life based on the truth.. All else will be false and fake…..
We as a species have a built in fight or flight response, we want to avoid danger and pain and at times it is important to run but often we run when we should be fighting. We need to face and fight what we fear or else it will consume us. That is the beauty of the truth as it will not go away or change because we want it to but once we recognize what is actually true not what we think is true the freedom this offers is wondrous.
I hurts me to watch others run from the truth or to think they have found the truth on any matter when I can see and again I may be wrong on any of this but when I can see they are just beginning to peel away the layers of the onion. They must keep going as I must and seek out each new truth.
Then and only then can we achieve happiness, a fulfilled life and peace of mind. It is not things that bring this about and while our achievements in life are very important the true achievement is to accept this process and enjoy the journey..
We must forgive ourselves and face our fears to move on. Often we reject the very things that will help us on this journey as those things or people may have brought us to close to facing our fears and then we run to a more comfortable place but have no illusion those fears will always be there until we face them and those we have rejected may have been the key in bringing us closer to a better life.
I must stay the course even when it hurts even we I see others running away from the truth because if I do not I will not be true to myself. In the end what is right and true will prevail. I usually see that the more people use me as their reason for what has gone wrong in life the closer we are getting to the truth as anger and blame are defence mechanisms. I will take this from others and stay the course.
I am by no means even close to perfect but I do believe I have one quality at this time that is worthy to respect and for me to profess. I am willing to change, accept my faults and see the good in others even when they do not see it. I am willing to take responsibility for my actions and at times when it is necessary call others on this as well as to do nothing less would be cheating them of a life based on the truth. A life based on the truth is a life worth living.
We often do not see what is important in life what we should value and we take for granted these things. These will not end well as each moment we should value what is important, our families and a better life for all humanity.
We tend to focus on superficial and fake things that we think have meaning and are important but these will surely be shown for what they are. If you have someone of value to you look for the good in them. See beyond where they are and as my son says focus on the good things and the good times. We all have struggles and it is so easy to blame others for things in life but this will not move us towards a good life. Where you are at is only temporary and no matter how bad things may seem the solution is to face things head on and conquer your fears, your real fears and not follow the easy path because there really is no easy path in life. Surround yourself with people that truly care about you not people who make you feel good for the moment. Without struggles nothing accomplished is of value..
So stay the course but that course must be based on the truth and what is right even when it is hard and you want to run it will be worth it to do what is right not what feels comfortable. This is what makes a life worth living. Don’t give up on what should be right and important….
There are plenty of vultures out there to pull you in the wrong direction so they can get what they need for the moment but really they are not on course..
There should be nothing more important than doing what is right not what is easy…..
Life sure can be interesting, it can be full of joy or full of sorrow, full of pain or full of happiness, full of excitement or full of dullness, sometimes we make the choices and sometimes the choices are made for us.
On my personal journey and that really is what my blog is all about, my experinces and how I see the world, how I see life and how I grow and learn there are many small realizations along the way and sometimes huge ones. I would not say I have had at anytime that epiphany moment and I do look forward to that someday but I have had those many little moments. The important thing I realized long ago is that I needed to be open to them and I do believe I am.
One of these realizations is to find that balance between chasing want you desire and knowing when to stop. As long as you keep chasing someone they will keep running. There is a difference between being with someone and chasing them. There is a difference between trying to get out your ideas and forcing them onto people. Advertisers have figured this out a long time ago and I would say the best at it are those who peddle drugs as they get you hooked and then you are chasing them.
I think life is really simple and they we tend to complicate it which in turn kind of makes it seem a little crazy. We really know what we want but the problem is that what we want in the moment always changes. Just when we think we have it all figured out boom the next moment presents a left turn. That is what makes life exciting those left turns.
If you have something that is worthy, that is based on truth I do believe people will seek it out. Sometimes you have to chase others a little just to get the idea out but then you have to back off or they will not value it. Once they are hooked they will chase the idea and it is then the process of equilibrium can be worked out.
No magical formula for any of this just a moment by moment adjustment in our lives.
This is all part of the process of seeking the truth on any matter and if one is willing to do this, to be open to the changes and process that life offers they will be amazed at what life has in store.
I personally believe at this moment I have found this balance in regards to who and what I should chase, when to stop and why. Of course this may change but for now I will go with the realization. It seem to be all about letting go and doing the things you love because they are the things you love to do. Sure I hope my music and anything I do artistically is a success and I think I do everything within my power to bring this to light but at this point i just need to relax on it and other things in my life and while I have hopes as to how they will turn out I must also enjoy the moments I have without them. Very hard to do to let go on anything but once one accepts that they
really are holding onto to an illusion in the first place as control does not exist then the chances improve.
You never know who is watching from the sidelines and what they will bring to your journey.
I wrote this the other day and I think it offers great value.
I have had a tragedy happen in my life, My worst fear has come to pass and although I will not be going public with the details it has caused me more pain than I knew existed. I don’t know how others deal with these events in their life’s all I know is how I must and am dealing with it.
I am sharing this for 2 reasons;
1. To help me with the healing process.
2. with hope that it might offer something to others.
As one goes through the 5 stages of grieve; (Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance) and back and forth in the order you get to a stage where you realize that no matter how badly you want things to be different, no matter how hard and unfair it is there is not a damn thing you can do about it. Acceptance is the only option and also the hardest thing you can do but once you do this new horizons will open up.
What is beyond my control is beyond my control and as painful as it is you just have to get to this point. I really fucking hate it to no end but that won’t matter as again I have absolutely no control over what has happened.
I did not appeal to god or any other supernatural entity as I realized this was useless and more harm than good. I just worked and am still working my way through it. Each choice we make leads’ to another choice and we often do not see the consequences of the choice we make in the moment. I do try and look beyond the moment in the moment but sadly this is only speculation and one cannot beat themselves up over what has happened in the past.
Now is the time to find something else worth fighting for, to value and to wake up each day to. What that will be for me I don’t know but it will be something.
I only have control over what I do and to be honest what I profess and have written about many times has actually eased the process even though the pain is unbearable at times. There is no point in me whining about what has transpired, no point in wishing it could be different as I did try this along the way as part of the process, I simply have to move on as we all do when a tragedy strikes. Often a tragedy forces you to make changes that really needed to happen but just needed a kick in the ass to get started.
This is not about the details as they will be different for each person this is about finding a way to get through it, wanting to live and to find value in life even when you feel life does not value you.
No one is exempt from personal tragedy. Sometimes we see it coming and other times it just hits us like a ton of bricks but still it comes and has no regard how you will feel about it. Life fucking sucks’ at times but I personally must find the part that does not suck. How I will do this is the journey and the discoveries I must make. I take stock of what I do have and place a new value on this. The rut has been filled and nature has given me personally a giant kick in the balls. So I will absorb the pain and find a way to kick nature back.
I am not writing this not to look for sympathy or to cry poor me as that simply will not help. What I have lost is something I can never get back no matter how much I want it and that is a fact that must be acknowledged or a person will go insane.
I hope that what I have written offers someone somewhere some comfort, some realization and some hope, I hope that my music and words are able to connect with others at some point.
Reality at times truly sucks but it is all we have.
